One of the things I’m always wanting to get to know about how to explain in another language is my family, because I’m very big on family and I like to brag. Well, I mainly just talk about my mother and youngest brother because I have the most to say about them. My middle brother and father has like some bragging and mostly complaining.
But I've noticed a trend. Through-out the languages I learn all the books seem to do the same thing, give me only a handful of vocabulary words to go off. (languages btw mean, Spanish, Italian, Japanese, and Chinese. Eventually French. [yes, that's me bragging about myself]) So I'm stuck using those to describe my family members. It usually works for my mom and brother, they get things like 'nice' and 'cool', but my brother and dad get like 'short-tempered'. Extra work of searching up other things? I think not, I'll just stick to the truth with the short vocab words I got, thanks.
This usually works except it makes me look like I don't like my middle brother and dad. I do, just only some of the time. I mean, we all have those moments where even the people we adore say something and you want to strangle them. Not enough to kill 'em, but to make 'em shut up. Yeah, well, they do that.
I'm not sure what the point of this blog is exactly, except that it striked me odd that I have this habit. I'm also avoiding homework, specifically piles of Italian homework. I even twittered earlier. Who twitters? Ha ha.
Wednesday, December 8, 2010
Wednesday, November 10, 2010
Fear of the Unknown
This is all just contemplative thoughts from what I've read about, watched, and discussed. It's mostly formed through taking Horror Films and Supernatural Japan this semester. Anyways:
What about the unknown makes it so fearful? To be painfully simple, it's unknown. But, let me delve into this more. The moment something becomes unknown, we are unable to label it in any way. Without the ability to label it, we can't exert power over it, even if it's power imagined in our heads. The unknown then is like a monster from a horror genre, any one among the wide genres in that. It is a sadistic killer, a vengeful ghost, a karmic force, etc. but no matter what it is, it is horrifying because it is unknown and the worst thing about the unknown is that we don't know whether to fear it and if we should, how to combat against it.
An example of this is the fact I do love a good Vampire book, but in real life when anyone jokes "wouldn't you love to met one then!?" my answer will always remain the same "No, that'd be ridiculously dangerous." A vampire from the original Dracula to the newest types in Twilight is still a dangerous creature that's driven purpose is to destroy us humans/mortal, yes even when they are 'good' as they are fighting against the urges. Therefore, if I met one, even if it is fighting the urge to drink my blood or drain me of my energy, it is physically dangerous to me.
Continuing with the example, I feel that if I was to even encounter a 'bad' vampire, I'd have some power over it. If given the chance and needed, I could stake them in the heart, attempt holy water throwing, hold a cross, not invite them into my house, burn their coffin, attack them with silver, and in a last attempt throw garlic at them or cut open an animal and hope they hunger for that more than I instead. If all these attempts were to fail for me, this vampire becomes an unknown vampire for me, it is not Dracula, it is not from Twilight, it is not from Anne Rice, or any other Vampire book I have read. It is completely unknown. I am defenseless physically and mentally.
What is terrifying about the unknown to me is exactly that. There is not even an idea of where to start on the monster (the unknown) one has encountered. Where do you even attempt to begin? How do you destroy the unknown? Here comes something even more terrifying, you must delve further into the unknown in order to destroy it. If you wanted to say, destroy the upper class family and yet didn't know their weakness, you could either go around trying everything and more likely end up in jail, or you could infiltrate the upper class, gain knowledge, and become mentally prepared (even if only slightly). Now, turning this back into mainly the diverse Horror genre of the unknown monster this is a common theme/issue in horror movies. The character in the Grudge must learn more about the ghost and thus thrust herself into open danger in hopes of finding information to destroy the ghost with. Same thing with Halloween, one of the characters must find out something to kill this psychotic thing that won't die, find out why it is here and hopefully stop it somehow.
But with the unknown you must delve deeper into it, open yourself up to danger and your wits, and race against time. Can you find that piece of information in time? Say, it is the start of a zombie apocalypse only unlike in the movies you can not bash them in the head and kill them, they still move. You must find several other zombies to hit in several other spots to find a weakness. Then to stop zombies entirely after this weakness, you must avoid them, kill all zombies you see, or find a way to reverse or kill of several of these zombies at once. You must race to do so because they are zombies, they are unknowns so hopefully they aren't fast as the movies always perceive them quite slow because they become troublesome in the movies even when slow!
Do you see my point? You have something you are faced with that you must destroy and that alone is difficult, you are killing. But now you are racing against time and now you must also force yourself into this problem all the more. The unknown is disturbing. Granted, not everything that is unknown can be terrifying in the case of fearing for ones life. In this case it is as I am talking of the horror genre therefore it is, but the unknown can be kind/misunderstood. In fact, many times in history this is what has happened, the Native Americans for example. This in no way justifies what they did to them, but because they feared them and didn't understand their ways they labeled them 'savages' saw them in a way as 'zombies' and something that needed to be destroyed. In this case, Fear has gotten the best of the victim and they are just killing off everything Unknown because they refuse to delve into it and to understand it.
This though connects back with something I did want to bring up, the fact most 'monsters' in horror films are abnormal or horrific, this is what makes them monstrous. If they aren't, there is no reason for there to be fear from this unknown thing that doesn't wish you harm. No matter what, the unknown must be horrific and monstrous to justify a reason for fearing the unknown for more than the fact we have no knowledge or understanding of it. Sure, it would be disturbing to wake up to an unknown ghost near your bed, but until they wish you harm or attempt it themselves, there is no reason to fear them or need to delve into them.
It is only when the unknown is horrific and monstrous does it become terrifying and not just a fear.
What about the unknown makes it so fearful? To be painfully simple, it's unknown. But, let me delve into this more. The moment something becomes unknown, we are unable to label it in any way. Without the ability to label it, we can't exert power over it, even if it's power imagined in our heads. The unknown then is like a monster from a horror genre, any one among the wide genres in that. It is a sadistic killer, a vengeful ghost, a karmic force, etc. but no matter what it is, it is horrifying because it is unknown and the worst thing about the unknown is that we don't know whether to fear it and if we should, how to combat against it.
An example of this is the fact I do love a good Vampire book, but in real life when anyone jokes "wouldn't you love to met one then!?" my answer will always remain the same "No, that'd be ridiculously dangerous." A vampire from the original Dracula to the newest types in Twilight is still a dangerous creature that's driven purpose is to destroy us humans/mortal, yes even when they are 'good' as they are fighting against the urges. Therefore, if I met one, even if it is fighting the urge to drink my blood or drain me of my energy, it is physically dangerous to me.
Continuing with the example, I feel that if I was to even encounter a 'bad' vampire, I'd have some power over it. If given the chance and needed, I could stake them in the heart, attempt holy water throwing, hold a cross, not invite them into my house, burn their coffin, attack them with silver, and in a last attempt throw garlic at them or cut open an animal and hope they hunger for that more than I instead. If all these attempts were to fail for me, this vampire becomes an unknown vampire for me, it is not Dracula, it is not from Twilight, it is not from Anne Rice, or any other Vampire book I have read. It is completely unknown. I am defenseless physically and mentally.
What is terrifying about the unknown to me is exactly that. There is not even an idea of where to start on the monster (the unknown) one has encountered. Where do you even attempt to begin? How do you destroy the unknown? Here comes something even more terrifying, you must delve further into the unknown in order to destroy it. If you wanted to say, destroy the upper class family and yet didn't know their weakness, you could either go around trying everything and more likely end up in jail, or you could infiltrate the upper class, gain knowledge, and become mentally prepared (even if only slightly). Now, turning this back into mainly the diverse Horror genre of the unknown monster this is a common theme/issue in horror movies. The character in the Grudge must learn more about the ghost and thus thrust herself into open danger in hopes of finding information to destroy the ghost with. Same thing with Halloween, one of the characters must find out something to kill this psychotic thing that won't die, find out why it is here and hopefully stop it somehow.
But with the unknown you must delve deeper into it, open yourself up to danger and your wits, and race against time. Can you find that piece of information in time? Say, it is the start of a zombie apocalypse only unlike in the movies you can not bash them in the head and kill them, they still move. You must find several other zombies to hit in several other spots to find a weakness. Then to stop zombies entirely after this weakness, you must avoid them, kill all zombies you see, or find a way to reverse or kill of several of these zombies at once. You must race to do so because they are zombies, they are unknowns so hopefully they aren't fast as the movies always perceive them quite slow because they become troublesome in the movies even when slow!
Do you see my point? You have something you are faced with that you must destroy and that alone is difficult, you are killing. But now you are racing against time and now you must also force yourself into this problem all the more. The unknown is disturbing. Granted, not everything that is unknown can be terrifying in the case of fearing for ones life. In this case it is as I am talking of the horror genre therefore it is, but the unknown can be kind/misunderstood. In fact, many times in history this is what has happened, the Native Americans for example. This in no way justifies what they did to them, but because they feared them and didn't understand their ways they labeled them 'savages' saw them in a way as 'zombies' and something that needed to be destroyed. In this case, Fear has gotten the best of the victim and they are just killing off everything Unknown because they refuse to delve into it and to understand it.
This though connects back with something I did want to bring up, the fact most 'monsters' in horror films are abnormal or horrific, this is what makes them monstrous. If they aren't, there is no reason for there to be fear from this unknown thing that doesn't wish you harm. No matter what, the unknown must be horrific and monstrous to justify a reason for fearing the unknown for more than the fact we have no knowledge or understanding of it. Sure, it would be disturbing to wake up to an unknown ghost near your bed, but until they wish you harm or attempt it themselves, there is no reason to fear them or need to delve into them.
It is only when the unknown is horrific and monstrous does it become terrifying and not just a fear.
Sunday, October 24, 2010
Due Volto a Italia! Debere se in primavera o estate?
Title says (btw): My second tour of Italy (volto is like tour/trip/etc.). Should it be in spring or summer? (If my Italian is wrong, please correct me!)
So here's my problem... I want to go to Italy and I want my mother to be able to visit towards the end. I would like to show off my Italian as I show her around the places I've been.~ She went with me (and my grandmother) the first time I ever went and we both loved it. It was also a major great bonding moment for us. Especially because a few weeks before we left... She found out I had been cutting myself and got me a counselor. =w=;;
Anyways, I feel in love with Italy and promised myself to go back. Yay for Studying Abroad in college for giving me the opportunity~! I don't want a full year in Italy, so only a semester, and I also really want to study abroad in Boston. So a semester in Italy and another in Boston, one full year of studying abroad. Hurrah~
Now the problem that has arisen is that Boston is fucking cold... Like srsly, it's cold. I'm used to cold from my home town, but for the past few years it hasn't snowed as much and thus hasn't been cold as much (I know, cold = snow, but you know what I mean)... So my tolerance is dropping. I'm used to 40-50 degree weather, 30s-ish as well if I know I'm not going to be out for long. >.<;;
From what I read it tends to be in the 40-30s... But Ryu, my boyfriend, has me a bit scared it's worse. D: If that's so, I'm highly considering now a study program that's one month during the summer and then staying for a month after and traveling around on my own/ with month... That would let me go to Boston in Spring instead of the effing cold Fall semester... But then would it really be enough time in Italy?
All these thoughts I need to think about. I honestly think I should toughen up and just bite the cold in the face. 5 months in Italy... Can I pass that up just cuz I'm a freezing chicken?
So here's my problem... I want to go to Italy and I want my mother to be able to visit towards the end. I would like to show off my Italian as I show her around the places I've been.~ She went with me (and my grandmother) the first time I ever went and we both loved it. It was also a major great bonding moment for us. Especially because a few weeks before we left... She found out I had been cutting myself and got me a counselor. =w=;;
Anyways, I feel in love with Italy and promised myself to go back. Yay for Studying Abroad in college for giving me the opportunity~! I don't want a full year in Italy, so only a semester, and I also really want to study abroad in Boston. So a semester in Italy and another in Boston, one full year of studying abroad. Hurrah~
Now the problem that has arisen is that Boston is fucking cold... Like srsly, it's cold. I'm used to cold from my home town, but for the past few years it hasn't snowed as much and thus hasn't been cold as much (I know, cold = snow, but you know what I mean)... So my tolerance is dropping. I'm used to 40-50 degree weather, 30s-ish as well if I know I'm not going to be out for long. >.<;;
From what I read it tends to be in the 40-30s... But Ryu, my boyfriend, has me a bit scared it's worse. D: If that's so, I'm highly considering now a study program that's one month during the summer and then staying for a month after and traveling around on my own/ with month... That would let me go to Boston in Spring instead of the effing cold Fall semester... But then would it really be enough time in Italy?
All these thoughts I need to think about. I honestly think I should toughen up and just bite the cold in the face. 5 months in Italy... Can I pass that up just cuz I'm a freezing chicken?
Saturday, October 9, 2010
" Stop, Go Back, Try Again" by regularjaneflying on DA. Please give all credit to her.
"I'm battle scarred... I am working oh so hard. to get back to who I used to be."
I was always a hard worker and determined. I liked having my fun and getting away with things, but I balanced it all out. The moment she started to die, towards the end of my freshman year in college, my grades job, my smile began to become fake, my weight increased, and my lack of care with the world started... The moments that I should've made happen with us, I let slip through my fingers like sand. I regret that a lot.
I also had something happen that summer that ruined me for awhile. I didn't honestly feel better about it till crying to my mother I said what I felt. I was afraid God would shun me for the sin and so I tried to hide from his eyes. I felt so disgusted with myself I gained weight subconsciously on purpose and I have this thing now where I hate when guys look at me...
But lately I have been getting more friends. I have been telling my mother everything. I am getting much closer to my boyfriend and Cj himself is starting to spend more time with us again. I still have a very long way to go, but I am realizing again just how blessed I am.
"Near to you, I am healing, but it's taking so long... 'Cause though [s]he's gone and you are wonderful, it's hard to move on. Yet, I'm better near to you."
I believe I have lived so far one of the best lives out there. I have been more blessed than maybe 1 million people out there. I can say this with confidence. Never once have I truly gone hungry. I have never not had someone out there thinking about me at least once during that day. I have people online and in person who know me so well. I have things to do and am never really bored.
I know most of my cousins well, my friends and I spend time together, my boyfriends a great sweetheart, and my brothers are definitely my brothers, we are close. My parents worry about me, my dad looking for cars for me, my mother freaking out when she doesn't hear from me in one day. My aunt letting me always do laundry at her house and feeding me. My aunts in cali, one letting me call them and helping when I was sick once, along with my uncle actually coming over and helping me feel better. My other aunt giving me an opportunity to go to Hawaii and San Francisco. My grandparents on both sides of the family paying attention to me.
My boyfriends never even met me! Three of my really close online friends haven't either, but we do so much for each other! I must have something about me, right? I need to continue thanking God, making everyone know how much I appreciate them, and for once, leaning on their shoulders when I need to cry. I need to stop holding it in and acting like I'm alone, because I never have been once.
I need to get up and start being myself again. I need to study hard and do everything that I need to do. None of it really was as bad as I was making it out to seem. Grandma, I will always do the one thing you always taught us: "Live life without regrets. Care for everyone and share the love. Always listen to your heart."
I will take your examples and form them into my own. I too want to live a life that like you, completely changes people forever.
"I only know that I am better where you are... I only know that I belong where you are."
Letting go is so hard...
"flying, lonely, days" by KalbiCamdan on DA. Please give all credit to him.
"[S]he's disappearing, fading suddenly. I'm so close to being yours. Won't you stay with me, please?"
My grandmother died in May this year... I am the type of person that hides all her emotions inside. Bottles them up so nice and tight she nearly forgets they existed at all. But then something comes along, nudges just a bit, and everything goes wrong. I said I was lazy last semester, but to be honest I was denying even to myself that I was depressed. I was going to lose my grandmother soon and I knew it. I prayed selfishly to God, for just one more Christmas, and then after he granted that, for one more birthday celebration. He gave that to me too.
I remember calling her up after my first A on my English 101 paper and Grandma laughing said, "I'm not surprised." I remember Grandma calling to remind me that Sherlock Holmes was on and me usually going over and watching them with her. Often I had to explain what was going on because they spoke so quietly sometimes even I had trouble hearing them.... But I also remember, missing her and visiting only once on the weekend I'm down there because I can see the way she is dying. I remember telling her I couldn't watch the show tonight, be it Jane Austen Theater show or Sherlock Holmes, because I am lazy at home on the couch, and taking her for granted...
If she was here, she'd be sad I'm thinking like that. She didn't like anyone to blame things on themselves. She didn't like to cry either. I don't believe once I ever saw her do so. It didn't hit me till last week, when I was afraid for Cj, that she was really gone. Suddenly, it was like I got punched in the lungs and couldn't breathe...
"Such pain as this shouldn't have to be experienced. I'm still reeling from the loss, still a little bit delirious."
Suddenly everything I'm doing is bringing me to tears. I went to McDonald the other day and thought "these fries are perfectly salted!" and then with my own tears salted them some more. I remembered that time Grandma wasn't supposed to have salt, and I snuck in some fries with her and secretly we ate them together. I can see her licking her fingers and smiling at me...
I relish, like a spoiled child, the fact I was the last person to show her the fall. We ate at Scholostksys, she got tortilla soup and a sandwich. Because I was vegetarian at the time, I gave her all my pepperonis. She praised the soup, I remember that she'd really enjoyed it. We went by Bonito lake and took tons of pictures. The leaves crisp and bright with color, red, yellow, and fiery mixtures. She talked to me and I was able to see nature the way she did, as one of Gods miracles and our greatest pleasures...
I put all of my hair up once, despite hating the lack of security my bangs gave me from covering part of my face, and she told me "I told you you'd look best with all the hair out of your face!" She was always wanting me to put all my hair up and to get "those bangs out of your face"... I only did it once, but I still hear her voice in my head when I am looking in the mirror and finding things wrong...
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
You know they say...
That Mexico isn't pretty safe right now, right? You wouldn't do anything that stupid... Right? [edited this.]
You know that when you leave us and we don't know where you are... It's more than just lonely. It's pitch black. So dark that there's no point in searching for a light. We always keep hanging on, hoping, pretending that nothing really bad could happen...
When this happens, I see you before you were to tall for me to reach. Before you were to big to not listen to me, to not fight it. I see you as I pedal back up the street, blood on the concrete, the bike, and pouring down your face. I hear the shouting of mom as she grabs and picks you up and I watch as she carries you away. She's rushing, Alex in the stroller and you in her arms. She's like God then. She's always been like that since. Like she could fix the world.
But Cj, she can't fix you no matter how hard she's tried, and lately it's been killing her. Slowly and where you can't see it, but if you try you can feel it just as deep as I can. I need you to feel it because none of us could take it if she cracked.
And none of us could take it, if you never came back.... I don't tell you nearly enough how much I love you.
Like that time we were rocking on the chair and Daddy told us not too. But I kept rocking us anyways and as we tipped over, I pushed you out and got a black eye, and you cried louder than I had. Were you scarred as you fell back and I fell forward? That's what I feel like now. Useless as you push us away, where our backs our turned and we can't see where we're about to land. I'm just scared to keep waiting for that sicking crack, the way you had when you heard my face hit the wooden table. I don't want to hear you crack, all the while falling, unable to do anything.
[ A letter to my brother. ]
You know that when you leave us and we don't know where you are... It's more than just lonely. It's pitch black. So dark that there's no point in searching for a light. We always keep hanging on, hoping, pretending that nothing really bad could happen...
When this happens, I see you before you were to tall for me to reach. Before you were to big to not listen to me, to not fight it. I see you as I pedal back up the street, blood on the concrete, the bike, and pouring down your face. I hear the shouting of mom as she grabs and picks you up and I watch as she carries you away. She's rushing, Alex in the stroller and you in her arms. She's like God then. She's always been like that since. Like she could fix the world.
But Cj, she can't fix you no matter how hard she's tried, and lately it's been killing her. Slowly and where you can't see it, but if you try you can feel it just as deep as I can. I need you to feel it because none of us could take it if she cracked.
And none of us could take it, if you never came back.... I don't tell you nearly enough how much I love you.
Like that time we were rocking on the chair and Daddy told us not too. But I kept rocking us anyways and as we tipped over, I pushed you out and got a black eye, and you cried louder than I had. Were you scarred as you fell back and I fell forward? That's what I feel like now. Useless as you push us away, where our backs our turned and we can't see where we're about to land. I'm just scared to keep waiting for that sicking crack, the way you had when you heard my face hit the wooden table. I don't want to hear you crack, all the while falling, unable to do anything.
[ A letter to my brother. ]
Thursday, June 10, 2010
Could You Grant Me a Wish?
Could You Grant Me a Wish?
Please keep smiling as usual.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
"Ali told me just how pretty you'd become and how grown-up and changed, but it's one of those things that you just had to see it to believe it! Who knew you'd be so gorgeous!"
That's what my Aunt said and honestly, I hear it quite a bit, so I'm used to it. It certainly boosts my ego. But I wish I could just get rid of that nagging voice in the back of my head where I am constantly hearing where pieces of me could use improvement.
But I've heard that's one thing you can't ever get rid of, so I'll just keep thinking "you are your own worst critique" so when I get myself real down. I can bring myself back up.
I did a bunch of homework over this weekend with grandma, so I plan on keeping that up, because it felt great to be organized and accomplished. I started to fall back into the lazy pattern today and felt depressing and useless as shit.
I've found the start of all my problems. At least now I know where to start in fixing it.
- - - - - - - - - - - -
I finally see, those parts of me you'd pointed out.
The things I'd doubted that existed.
I'll work hard to piece it all together.
Please keep smiling as usual.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
"Ali told me just how pretty you'd become and how grown-up and changed, but it's one of those things that you just had to see it to believe it! Who knew you'd be so gorgeous!"
That's what my Aunt said and honestly, I hear it quite a bit, so I'm used to it. It certainly boosts my ego. But I wish I could just get rid of that nagging voice in the back of my head where I am constantly hearing where pieces of me could use improvement.
But I've heard that's one thing you can't ever get rid of, so I'll just keep thinking "you are your own worst critique" so when I get myself real down. I can bring myself back up.
I did a bunch of homework over this weekend with grandma, so I plan on keeping that up, because it felt great to be organized and accomplished. I started to fall back into the lazy pattern today and felt depressing and useless as shit.
I've found the start of all my problems. At least now I know where to start in fixing it.
- - - - - - - - - - - -
I finally see, those parts of me you'd pointed out.
The things I'd doubted that existed.
I'll work hard to piece it all together.
Sunday, April 25, 2010
Your Face Imprinted on my Window Pane. ღ
I'm currently in love with this song. However, i can't find a buyable or downloadable version of this song. It really makes me sad, because it's just beautiful, gorgeous, and stunning. I adore it.
Anyways, only two more weeks of school before finals and then this semester is done. I'm shocked, like blown away. Time really flies so fast. I've been really busy, with homework, club activities, and life in general. It's a bit BLAHHH-like. But compared to last week, boy this week seems a bit like a breeze. No joke. Ha ha ha.
Righty-o! I dropped Geology, without officialy dropping it, so mom's going to beat me when she sees the F that brings down my gpa. FML. Besides that though, I have to get like an A+++ on my Eastern Religions final, because I missed the 2nd exam on Buddhism and I forgot about the essay... OTL. I should be able to get a C in that class then. If not, I'm really worried about my gpa... As you can see, I'm not worried about my other classes... just Eastern Religions. KIDDDOS DON'T EVER BE LIKE ME. I swear, I never will be again. SRSLY.
On another note: I have to get up early so I can go get the stupid holds off my account, so I can register for classes. It opens at 8:15, and I'm sure they'll be hella busy, so I'm thinking I'll show up at 8:30, get out and have registered by 9, printed off an application sheet to the college of my choice (for my major), fill it out, and chyeah, wait till class at 11... =3=;; Probably eat breakfast and finish my Japanese homework, or at least mostly finish it.
Bai bai!
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
FML, YES?
I'm exhausted just thinking about my schedule for this week...
Today, I got to sleep in till 2, because I knew I wouldn't have a chance to stop moving until now and once I open my eyes at 6 in the morning tomorrow it'll be gone then also. I also didn't get home until after class and the anime club meeting, which ended at 9:35, but I was talking to my mom, so I didn't go inside till 10:10. I made the brownies, which are now cooling (tis 11 now) and probably won't be done till 12, after memorizing my Japanese presentation for tomorrow.
Wednesday: - wake up early at 6 - so I can be at the S lot bus stop 30 minutes before class, giving me 20 minutes to drop off the brownies for the bake sale (in the anime club room) before Geology at 8.
Class until 10, where I will then read what I can for 20 minutes in my Eastern Religions book, before going downstairs in the SUB to get the brownies out of the AC room and take it to the bake sale, helping set up until class at 11, then returning after class. (somewhere in here printing off the presentation sheet)
Practicing for our Japanese presentation before class with joy while selling at the bake sale. Then going to class at 1, then presenting in Japanese class at 2, then going back to help at the bake sale after class at 3, until going home after set-up.
Baking the cupcakes when I get home so they will have time to cool and be decorated. Finishing my 250 point package due in professional writing on Thursday, including revising and perfecting it. Depending on how long it takes me to do this, probably around 5 hours, eating dinner while reading eastern religions and finishing the 4 chapters in there, so I can choose which essay question to choose so I can start writing on it since it's due the 23rd.
Going to bed after doing the dishes.
Thursday: Get up early, like at 9 (which means getting up at 8 so I'm dressed & having eaten) and finish my Eastern Regions essay so I can print it at school. That'll probably take a good 3 hours. Make sure the cupcakes are etc and etc... Head over to S lot and park there so I can take the cupcakes over and help sell them until class at 5. Work on all my Japanese workbook homework while there (at the bake sale), which'll probably take around 4 hours. After class (during class turn in finished 250 point package, starting on article during class), finish Japanese homework if not done already before starting on the Dragon w/everyone helping at anime club. Shower and eat dinner when I get home. Then, depending on the time, read philosophy chapter, but if it's like 11, just go ahead and head to bed.
(And I just realized that nowhere in there did I put studying for my Geology test, so somewhere I'm doing that, probably going to pull quite a late nighter.)
Friday: Get up and take my Geology test at 8, and hopefully not walk away crying. Help with the bake sale again between breaks at 10 and 12, as well as then going after class (at 3). Then at 4, going to meet again to finish the dragon recylce bin with anime club. Joy's sleeping over, so I'll probably like have us watch a movie or something, after eating dinner cha know? I'll try to like read my philosophy chapter or Japanese homework in there, while we do that.
Saturday: Wake up at 8:45 cuz we have Spring storm at 9:45 in front of the gym, going off with the Anime Club team to do some volunteer work. Joy & I breaking off around 1 if we're not done, to help Devon set up the booth at 2, and sticking around to help with the booth until that's done. Probably going around Fiestas ourselves when we can & what not.
When I get home, finally organizing all my homework and doing stuff like that. I was also going to add on my extra homework, you know, like:
- studying for art history final and all other finals. which is like printing off term papers (w/vocabs and stuff).
- Geology term paper, as well as extra credit.
- Japanese studying, like tons of Kanji and finishing all homework as well as keeping up with the homework from now on.
- Philosophy essay, bringing draft to the meeting on the 30th, doing extra credit stuff at the extra credit classes. (this is technically my last week in there.)
- Reading the Tao Te Ching for Eastern Religions.
- Reading the last 2 chapters for Art History.
- Reading in Geology, as well as catching up for past chapters, for cumulative final.
- AND SHIT TONS MORE.
Along with you know, fitting in the fact I have more stuff for clubs, like attending the meetings, doing the write-up for high school like assigned to me this week, finishing ercole and lorraine grown-up drawing for nea so they can be drawn, squeezing in calls with my parents (and friends like Zach & Tyler), and etc.
BUT YEAH, see how much my life sucks right now?
BTW BECAUSE WE ALL KNOW THAT COLD SORES, WHICH IS LIKE HERPES (LOOK IT UP), I GET ONE RIGHT BEFORE MAID CAFE, CUZ YOU KNOW, THAT'LL HELP SALES, AM I RIGHT?
FUCK MY LIFE RIGHT NOW.
I'm off to eat ramen, and sob about my situation while memorizing my presentation draft.
Today, I got to sleep in till 2, because I knew I wouldn't have a chance to stop moving until now and once I open my eyes at 6 in the morning tomorrow it'll be gone then also. I also didn't get home until after class and the anime club meeting, which ended at 9:35, but I was talking to my mom, so I didn't go inside till 10:10. I made the brownies, which are now cooling (tis 11 now) and probably won't be done till 12, after memorizing my Japanese presentation for tomorrow.
Wednesday: - wake up early at 6 - so I can be at the S lot bus stop 30 minutes before class, giving me 20 minutes to drop off the brownies for the bake sale (in the anime club room) before Geology at 8.
Class until 10, where I will then read what I can for 20 minutes in my Eastern Religions book, before going downstairs in the SUB to get the brownies out of the AC room and take it to the bake sale, helping set up until class at 11, then returning after class. (somewhere in here printing off the presentation sheet)
Practicing for our Japanese presentation before class with joy while selling at the bake sale. Then going to class at 1, then presenting in Japanese class at 2, then going back to help at the bake sale after class at 3, until going home after set-up.
Baking the cupcakes when I get home so they will have time to cool and be decorated. Finishing my 250 point package due in professional writing on Thursday, including revising and perfecting it. Depending on how long it takes me to do this, probably around 5 hours, eating dinner while reading eastern religions and finishing the 4 chapters in there, so I can choose which essay question to choose so I can start writing on it since it's due the 23rd.
Going to bed after doing the dishes.
Thursday: Get up early, like at 9 (which means getting up at 8 so I'm dressed & having eaten) and finish my Eastern Regions essay so I can print it at school. That'll probably take a good 3 hours. Make sure the cupcakes are etc and etc... Head over to S lot and park there so I can take the cupcakes over and help sell them until class at 5. Work on all my Japanese workbook homework while there (at the bake sale), which'll probably take around 4 hours. After class (during class turn in finished 250 point package, starting on article during class), finish Japanese homework if not done already before starting on the Dragon w/everyone helping at anime club. Shower and eat dinner when I get home. Then, depending on the time, read philosophy chapter, but if it's like 11, just go ahead and head to bed.
(And I just realized that nowhere in there did I put studying for my Geology test, so somewhere I'm doing that, probably going to pull quite a late nighter.)
Friday: Get up and take my Geology test at 8, and hopefully not walk away crying. Help with the bake sale again between breaks at 10 and 12, as well as then going after class (at 3). Then at 4, going to meet again to finish the dragon recylce bin with anime club. Joy's sleeping over, so I'll probably like have us watch a movie or something, after eating dinner cha know? I'll try to like read my philosophy chapter or Japanese homework in there, while we do that.
Saturday: Wake up at 8:45 cuz we have Spring storm at 9:45 in front of the gym, going off with the Anime Club team to do some volunteer work. Joy & I breaking off around 1 if we're not done, to help Devon set up the booth at 2, and sticking around to help with the booth until that's done. Probably going around Fiestas ourselves when we can & what not.
When I get home, finally organizing all my homework and doing stuff like that. I was also going to add on my extra homework, you know, like:
- studying for art history final and all other finals. which is like printing off term papers (w/vocabs and stuff).
- Geology term paper, as well as extra credit.
- Japanese studying, like tons of Kanji and finishing all homework as well as keeping up with the homework from now on.
- Philosophy essay, bringing draft to the meeting on the 30th, doing extra credit stuff at the extra credit classes. (this is technically my last week in there.)
- Reading the Tao Te Ching for Eastern Religions.
- Reading the last 2 chapters for Art History.
- Reading in Geology, as well as catching up for past chapters, for cumulative final.
- AND SHIT TONS MORE.
Along with you know, fitting in the fact I have more stuff for clubs, like attending the meetings, doing the write-up for high school like assigned to me this week, finishing ercole and lorraine grown-up drawing for nea so they can be drawn, squeezing in calls with my parents (and friends like Zach & Tyler), and etc.
BUT YEAH, see how much my life sucks right now?
BTW BECAUSE WE ALL KNOW THAT COLD SORES, WHICH IS LIKE HERPES (LOOK IT UP), I GET ONE RIGHT BEFORE MAID CAFE, CUZ YOU KNOW, THAT'LL HELP SALES, AM I RIGHT?
FUCK MY LIFE RIGHT NOW.
I'm off to eat ramen, and sob about my situation while memorizing my presentation draft.
Sunday, April 18, 2010
Th-Th-That's okay. Ge-Ge-Get away.~
Lately, I've been sick of myself. Been since like last last week too. This week was my feeling better and changing week. I totally failed. I always fail. OTL.
I need to try harder tomorrow. But I keep saying, tomorrow, tomorrow, tomorrow. Dad says the best thing in life is to "stop talking about it and just do it." He says some smart things every now and then...
I've also been thinking about writing a scary story, but I get stuck on the basis of the plot. Random ghost killer? But then I get stuck on trying to come up with a background. Random ghost killers bother me.
I think like that detective in Constantine:
"So when a mother drowns her child, your saying she was influenced? No. People do bad things Mr. Constantine. People."
So I'm like, she has to have a reason to be doing this, but I keep getting stuck on the reason and just wanting to go with this crazy killer ghost... UGH. I'll figure it out.
I need to get back to my stupid homework, after this scary movie. I have so much crap to do. What am I doing putting a scary movie and eating an orange first?
I need to try harder tomorrow. But I keep saying, tomorrow, tomorrow, tomorrow. Dad says the best thing in life is to "stop talking about it and just do it." He says some smart things every now and then...
I've also been thinking about writing a scary story, but I get stuck on the basis of the plot. Random ghost killer? But then I get stuck on trying to come up with a background. Random ghost killers bother me.
I think like that detective in Constantine:
"So when a mother drowns her child, your saying she was influenced? No. People do bad things Mr. Constantine. People."
So I'm like, she has to have a reason to be doing this, but I keep getting stuck on the reason and just wanting to go with this crazy killer ghost... UGH. I'll figure it out.
I need to get back to my stupid homework, after this scary movie. I have so much crap to do. What am I doing putting a scary movie and eating an orange first?
Thursday, April 15, 2010
♪ ♫ Let's Never Go Back to How We Were Before. Ch-Ch-Change. ღ
I'm looking to the future~!
Just wanted to post that I became an officer for Anime Club. Advertising, so it'll be very interesting and I'll have to definitely step out of my comfort zone...
But it'll hopefully get my self-esteem and confidence up, you know?
We have a maid cafe next week (my first!) so that'll be very interesting and pretty exciting.
I have tons of homework I should be doing, but I was watching Flapjack and then Johhny Test came on and distracted me. Even though I don't like this show... I'm hungry too. =w=;;
I'm going to go now. Ke ke ke ke.
Bai bai~!
Just wanted to post that I became an officer for Anime Club. Advertising, so it'll be very interesting and I'll have to definitely step out of my comfort zone...
But it'll hopefully get my self-esteem and confidence up, you know?
We have a maid cafe next week (my first!) so that'll be very interesting and pretty exciting.
I have tons of homework I should be doing, but I was watching Flapjack and then Johhny Test came on and distracted me. Even though I don't like this show... I'm hungry too. =w=;;
I'm going to go now. Ke ke ke ke.
Bai bai~!
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
Being Older is Hard Sometimes.
It's hard knowing that it's the truth. Everyone has to learn from their mistakes, because no matter how much you tell someone, they don't know until they've gone through it.
He's doing it again. Going back to his old ways... Damn it. What do I do? How can I just stand by and watch? But how can I get involved? Aigoo!(Korean for Oh man)
And that Megan Davis. I knew I hated her for a reason. Somewhere inside of me, I knew, I knew. Mom always said "Not to be so quick to judge." and stuff. But I was right. She's been helping him get drunk on the weekends. If she wants to F her own life up that's fine, but... AUGH. This is so complicated. It's not like she makes him drink, you know? But she helps him get it in a way? Going out of town to party at college kid houses. I wish you'd just been smart and moved to some fancy college far away, WOMAN!
I wish.... I wish I could help my brother. I wish I wasn't so damn weak. But look at me. I can't even make myself study harder...
It hurts. Damn it. It hurts.
He's doing it again. Going back to his old ways... Damn it. What do I do? How can I just stand by and watch? But how can I get involved? Aigoo!(Korean for Oh man)
And that Megan Davis. I knew I hated her for a reason. Somewhere inside of me, I knew, I knew. Mom always said "Not to be so quick to judge." and stuff. But I was right. She's been helping him get drunk on the weekends. If she wants to F her own life up that's fine, but... AUGH. This is so complicated. It's not like she makes him drink, you know? But she helps him get it in a way? Going out of town to party at college kid houses. I wish you'd just been smart and moved to some fancy college far away, WOMAN!
I wish.... I wish I could help my brother. I wish I wasn't so damn weak. But look at me. I can't even make myself study harder...
It hurts. Damn it. It hurts.
Monday, April 5, 2010
Could You Grant Me a Wish?
Please keep smiling as usual.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
"Ali told me just how pretty you'd become and how grown-up and changed, but it's one of those things that you just had to see it to believe it! Who knew you'd be so gorgeous!"
That's what my Aunt said and honestly, I hear it quite a bit, so I'm used to it. It certainly boosts my ego. But I wish I could just get rid of that nagging voice in the back of my head where I am constantly hearing where pieces of me could use improvement.
But I've heard that's one thing you can't ever get rid of, so I'll just keep thinking "you are your own worst critique" so when I get myself real down. I can bring myself back up.
I did a bunch of homework over this weekend with grandma, so I plan on keeping that up, because it felt great to be organized and accomplished. I started to fall back into the lazy pattern today and felt depressing and useless as shit.
I've found the start of all my problems. At least now I know where to start in fixing it.
- - - - - - - - - - - -
I finally see, those parts of me you'd pointed out.
The things I'd doubted that existed.
I'll work hard to piece it all together.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
"Ali told me just how pretty you'd become and how grown-up and changed, but it's one of those things that you just had to see it to believe it! Who knew you'd be so gorgeous!"
That's what my Aunt said and honestly, I hear it quite a bit, so I'm used to it. It certainly boosts my ego. But I wish I could just get rid of that nagging voice in the back of my head where I am constantly hearing where pieces of me could use improvement.
But I've heard that's one thing you can't ever get rid of, so I'll just keep thinking "you are your own worst critique" so when I get myself real down. I can bring myself back up.
I did a bunch of homework over this weekend with grandma, so I plan on keeping that up, because it felt great to be organized and accomplished. I started to fall back into the lazy pattern today and felt depressing and useless as shit.
I've found the start of all my problems. At least now I know where to start in fixing it.
- - - - - - - - - - - -
I finally see, those parts of me you'd pointed out.
The things I'd doubted that existed.
I'll work hard to piece it all together.
Friday, March 12, 2010
Kpop
Let's forget for a moment that I should be studying for the Japanese mid-term before I leave for Eastern Religions at 10:35 and just focus on the Kpop. Mmmkay?
http://letsplay2ne1.wordpress.com/2010/03/11/caps-2ne1-try-to-follow-me-mv/mvcap/
"I got that thang thang if you know what I mean?
It goes bang bang, you can’t handle it"
http://letsplay2ne1.wordpress.com/2010/03/11/caps-2ne1-try-to-follow-me-mv/mvcap18/
First up.... Yay, 2NE1! The "Try to Follow Me" MV was finally released. Ignoring the fact FB didn't show it till this morning (despite Sole-choo having posted it 12 hours ago), it's a really interesting thing. Their style's just as weird as when they first came out. Not that I'm really against Kpop bands changing their looks, in fact F.Cuz and BEAST look really freaking sexy, like homfg. However, I was afraid that everyone's doing it to follow a trend, so I'm glad to see some people are still staying with what they started with? New's good, but no change is also. Besides. I feel that when 2NE1 came out, part of their thing was their really unique original style and personalities, both which were definitely there in the MV.
There was an article that bugged me though. Whoever wrote about Dongho's (from U-Kiss) "Unexpected Hobby", was really biast and this is why we can't ever get past the feminist barrier. Either it's the men saying " what a strange hobby" when the women do something that's labeled MANRY or its the girls saying " How unexpected/shocking!" when the guys do something LADRY like. It's like, come on. People can do what they want and frick, if Dongho wants to knit, LET THE MAN KNIT!
Something funny, btw. Was it just me or did Jin Woon (from 2AM) look really different from the picture Allkpop had on the article compared to himself in the MV? Ha ha. Is that picture even Jin Woon? I don't follow those guys, so I really don't know. NVM, maybe it is another guy & I just made myself stupid. OTL. However, I like the hair and how he's yelling in the hallway at the end. I also love the fight scene in the pool & the ridiculous girl scream. Total KDRAMA. I LOVE IT.
BTW, jumping back to 2NE1, I love the style for Minzy & CL from the Bean Pole Shoot. Super duper cute. Also, I'm glad their finally on a show. Episode 2 of Kang Shim Kan. I haven't watched it yet, but I'm sure it'll be good. KOREAN VARIETY SHOWS DON'T LET ME DOWN, EVER. They haven't yet & I strongly doubt they ever will.
Speaking of Variety shows. MBLAQ on Idol Army apparently tried to impress F(x)'s Sulli. Am I the only one that doesn't really find her all that cute? owo;; I mean, they can like whoever, but she's just NOT my type. But Thunder and her dancing together, THEY SHOULD DATE. Don't you think? Their both really cute (personalities). Ha ha. This episode reconfirmed that my dream job would be as a Korean MC, hosting variety shows with Kpop Bands & laughging ALL THE FREAKING TIME.
KARA won with their song Lupin. I just saw the live performance. SEXY. I need to watch them more, I guess. I hear the battle between the 3 girl kpop bands was pretty intense. Too bad I missed it. Ha ha. But boy, T-ara sure is a really mature band, ne? I can't help thinking they need some practice singing live, though I feel they really commanded attention on the stage, so that is saying something.
Did you guys catch whiff of the rumour about Lee Teuk (SJ) & Taeyoen(SNSD) supposedly dating? I think I'd agree if "matching necklaces" was their evidence. Like srsly? It's not like Kpop Bands only buy original necklaces. Lolololol.
I really liked how F.T. island looked naked for the face shot since they were apparently shirtless. LOLOLOLOL. You know how sometimes the picture can get cut off by your screen? I saw just a bit of it at first and went " WHUT WHUT!?" -quickly scrolled down- Only to find it was just a head shot. Too bad.
I also need to watch F.T island with the behind the scene for the bare head shots ^ from the mentioned above shoot, as they were hilarious & silly, from what I hear.
I need money to buy so many Kpop albums. BEAST, F(x), F.T. Island, F.Cuz, MBLAQ, 2NE1, and More. OTL.
I leave you with a song that's been stuck in my head. So bittersweet. (Take care of my GF, [say no!] by BEAST)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=95I5oz9wHPc
"THAT THAT THAT THAT THAT'S OKAY.~
GET GET GET GET AWAY!
It's okay, it's not like we have anything to do with each other anymore.
Stop saying sorry, my heart doesn't hurt!
Please be a good boyfriend to her in place of me..."
http://letsplay2ne1.wordpress.com/2010/03/11/caps-2ne1-try-to-follow-me-mv/mvcap/
"I got that thang thang if you know what I mean?
It goes bang bang, you can’t handle it"
http://letsplay2ne1.wordpress.com/2010/03/11/caps-2ne1-try-to-follow-me-mv/mvcap18/
First up.... Yay, 2NE1! The "Try to Follow Me" MV was finally released. Ignoring the fact FB didn't show it till this morning (despite Sole-choo having posted it 12 hours ago), it's a really interesting thing. Their style's just as weird as when they first came out. Not that I'm really against Kpop bands changing their looks, in fact F.Cuz and BEAST look really freaking sexy, like homfg. However, I was afraid that everyone's doing it to follow a trend, so I'm glad to see some people are still staying with what they started with? New's good, but no change is also. Besides. I feel that when 2NE1 came out, part of their thing was their really unique original style and personalities, both which were definitely there in the MV.
There was an article that bugged me though. Whoever wrote about Dongho's (from U-Kiss) "Unexpected Hobby", was really biast and this is why we can't ever get past the feminist barrier. Either it's the men saying " what a strange hobby" when the women do something that's labeled MANRY or its the girls saying " How unexpected/shocking!" when the guys do something LADRY like. It's like, come on. People can do what they want and frick, if Dongho wants to knit, LET THE MAN KNIT!
Something funny, btw. Was it just me or did Jin Woon (from 2AM) look really different from the picture Allkpop had on the article compared to himself in the MV? Ha ha. Is that picture even Jin Woon? I don't follow those guys, so I really don't know. NVM, maybe it is another guy & I just made myself stupid. OTL. However, I like the hair and how he's yelling in the hallway at the end. I also love the fight scene in the pool & the ridiculous girl scream. Total KDRAMA. I LOVE IT.
BTW, jumping back to 2NE1, I love the style for Minzy & CL from the Bean Pole Shoot. Super duper cute. Also, I'm glad their finally on a show. Episode 2 of Kang Shim Kan. I haven't watched it yet, but I'm sure it'll be good. KOREAN VARIETY SHOWS DON'T LET ME DOWN, EVER. They haven't yet & I strongly doubt they ever will.
Speaking of Variety shows. MBLAQ on Idol Army apparently tried to impress F(x)'s Sulli. Am I the only one that doesn't really find her all that cute? owo;; I mean, they can like whoever, but she's just NOT my type. But Thunder and her dancing together, THEY SHOULD DATE. Don't you think? Their both really cute (personalities). Ha ha. This episode reconfirmed that my dream job would be as a Korean MC, hosting variety shows with Kpop Bands & laughging ALL THE FREAKING TIME.
KARA won with their song Lupin. I just saw the live performance. SEXY. I need to watch them more, I guess. I hear the battle between the 3 girl kpop bands was pretty intense. Too bad I missed it. Ha ha. But boy, T-ara sure is a really mature band, ne? I can't help thinking they need some practice singing live, though I feel they really commanded attention on the stage, so that is saying something.
Did you guys catch whiff of the rumour about Lee Teuk (SJ) & Taeyoen(SNSD) supposedly dating? I think I'd agree if "matching necklaces" was their evidence. Like srsly? It's not like Kpop Bands only buy original necklaces. Lolololol.
I really liked how F.T. island looked naked for the face shot since they were apparently shirtless. LOLOLOLOL. You know how sometimes the picture can get cut off by your screen? I saw just a bit of it at first and went " WHUT WHUT!?" -quickly scrolled down- Only to find it was just a head shot. Too bad.
I also need to watch F.T island with the behind the scene for the bare head shots ^ from the mentioned above shoot, as they were hilarious & silly, from what I hear.
I need money to buy so many Kpop albums. BEAST, F(x), F.T. Island, F.Cuz, MBLAQ, 2NE1, and More. OTL.
I leave you with a song that's been stuck in my head. So bittersweet. (Take care of my GF, [say no!] by BEAST)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=95I5oz9wHPc
"THAT THAT THAT THAT THAT'S OKAY.~
GET GET GET GET AWAY!
It's okay, it's not like we have anything to do with each other anymore.
Stop saying sorry, my heart doesn't hurt!
Please be a good boyfriend to her in place of me..."
Sunday, March 7, 2010
Invisible,
These Next Two Weeks I Will Be.
I have mid-terms before spring break. /sobs
95 pages in Buddhism (for Eastern Religions) along witht he whole Dharma pudra w/e over spring break. OTL. It's so interesting to me I wish this was my only homework because I'm overlooking the rest reading this stuff. /shot
1 chapter in Art history, but there's a test so I'm reading the chapter & doing the study guide & then studying & etc till test on Friday. I should pass since I know a lot of this from reading the chapters and then listening [falling asleep these past 2 weeks, but somehow only dozing after I take notes and then waking up to take notes, & then repeating that cycle] in class lectures.
Philosophy exam on Wednesday. /sobs I missed 3 days in this class. WTF ARE PROBLEM TABLES? OR SOMETHING TABLES... ANSWER TABLES? O gawd, I'm screwed. I hope google answers this question for... OH SHIT, I HAVE PHILO HOMEWORK. I can turn it in late.... on the day of the test, since I don't know how to do those tables & yeah... Anyways, I hope to study harder for this & like review notes & read (5 chapters) and stuff...
Geology notes. I have to try to pay attention because at 8 in the morning I end up doodling, sleeping, or daydreaming. OTL. I need to google stuff too, since I didn't buy the optional book and have missed 5 days in that class. /shot
WATASHI WA DAIKIRAI NIHONGO NO BENKYO TO SHYUKUDAI SHIMASHI DESU YO. ( I hate studying and doing homework for japanese). I wish I could learn it through osmosis or LIKE STARFIRE FROM TEEN TITANS, BY KISS WITH A JAPANESE GUY. /atomic bombed for that. Mid-terms will kill me in this. /sobs I have Japanese study group @ 4 & 7 though, so I hope to get in a good 2 hours of real teaching there & hopefully catch up in homework tuesday to study hard on wed & thursday to not be completely butchered on Friday.
BTW, new House this week, so I need to watch that on HULU, along with episode 4 & 5 of Baka to etc. Which actually does help me study, as I understand quite a bit in Japanese School shows & besides, hearing Japanese and trying to understand it alone does really help.
Then Spring break! YAY! I have clue what I'm doing fully yet, but it invovles grandma time & family so I'll be pretty dead (online-wise) that week also.
GOODBYE SWEET WORLD.~
I have mid-terms before spring break. /sobs
95 pages in Buddhism (for Eastern Religions) along witht he whole Dharma pudra w/e over spring break. OTL. It's so interesting to me I wish this was my only homework because I'm overlooking the rest reading this stuff. /shot
1 chapter in Art history, but there's a test so I'm reading the chapter & doing the study guide & then studying & etc till test on Friday. I should pass since I know a lot of this from reading the chapters and then listening [falling asleep these past 2 weeks, but somehow only dozing after I take notes and then waking up to take notes, & then repeating that cycle] in class lectures.
Philosophy exam on Wednesday. /sobs I missed 3 days in this class. WTF ARE PROBLEM TABLES? OR SOMETHING TABLES... ANSWER TABLES? O gawd, I'm screwed. I hope google answers this question for... OH SHIT, I HAVE PHILO HOMEWORK. I can turn it in late.... on the day of the test, since I don't know how to do those tables & yeah... Anyways, I hope to study harder for this & like review notes & read (5 chapters) and stuff...
Geology notes. I have to try to pay attention because at 8 in the morning I end up doodling, sleeping, or daydreaming. OTL. I need to google stuff too, since I didn't buy the optional book and have missed 5 days in that class. /shot
WATASHI WA DAIKIRAI NIHONGO NO BENKYO TO SHYUKUDAI SHIMASHI DESU YO. ( I hate studying and doing homework for japanese). I wish I could learn it through osmosis or LIKE STARFIRE FROM TEEN TITANS, BY KISS WITH A JAPANESE GUY. /atomic bombed for that. Mid-terms will kill me in this. /sobs I have Japanese study group @ 4 & 7 though, so I hope to get in a good 2 hours of real teaching there & hopefully catch up in homework tuesday to study hard on wed & thursday to not be completely butchered on Friday.
BTW, new House this week, so I need to watch that on HULU, along with episode 4 & 5 of Baka to etc. Which actually does help me study, as I understand quite a bit in Japanese School shows & besides, hearing Japanese and trying to understand it alone does really help.
Then Spring break! YAY! I have clue what I'm doing fully yet, but it invovles grandma time & family so I'll be pretty dead (online-wise) that week also.
GOODBYE SWEET WORLD.~
Bu-- Well, just LIFE.
Friday, I got home and watched 3 episodes of Baka to Testo to Shokugan. GREAT ANIME. It's a manga too, but I haven't read it, so I can't say. Anyways, they have this trap called HIDEYOSHI, he's a guy but he looks like a girl and he's got a great voice actor. :D He's such a sexy bishie he looks like a real girl, that's how much he is. Plus, the whole anime's really funny, if not with some cheesy parts that are aimed to make fun of other animes & stuff, you know, like fanservice with a dude as a girl and a pervy guy that depicts most pervy guys in animes but to the extreme. Makes you wonder why schools aren't really like this, because srsly, I would study SO HARD.
Also, Ericka had a 'party' which consisted of chat rouletting with her friend and another for two hours and then doing actual party things once I decided to crawl into bed (after episode 3) at eleven. Party in your room next to mine with door open? Not so considerate, but she had let me know a week before if it would be okay and she told me about it the day before and that day too, so.... It just sucked cuz my ipod froze & then once I'd fixed it, it was like 'falling asleep' turn off ipod and become wide awake. I can't sleep with music, but party noises didn't help either... Finally went to bed after I texted and they moved to the living room at around 1:30.
Saturday, woke up at 8:10 to get ready and arrive on campus at 9:12 for Japanese Expo. Joy found Neal so we chatted in line for like 5 minutes before going inside and rushing to what I mis-read as Korean languages at 9:30 and really it was " You guys here for Yidish?" when we walked in & then like bow and walk out. Korean was at 10:00, which was great. ANN YONG! & some more words I learned but forgot & have the paper to learn later from. Had Japanese food, Russian pancake thing, french pastry, and got my name written in arabic, japanese(Laura wrote it in pretty calligraphy since we both know I can write it myself only crappy), and Chinese. Got to see how to do a yukata as well from my Sensee Machiko Bomberger-sama. Her mom is so cute & OLD, but cute. Also heard japanese folk tales, learned about chinese outfits, played latin guessing game, and had fun. It was overall, culturally rewarding. Will hope to bring Alex next time, he'd have fun.
Taco bell with Anee-chan. CHEAP and filling. :'D And then anime club, fun (weird chinese anime though) RUSHED to Ericka's play at 7 (got there at 7 having left at 6:45, from anime club and jogging to car), which turned out to be SO FUNNY. I can't wait till they open this Thursday. <3 Got home, played Blackjack with Anee-chan(Joy) bed at 1.
Sunday, Rush to check tickets for Alice in wonderland to find out it's what? SOLD OUT. Frick. Drive to her house to print ones at 4 and they get sold out within 10 minutes again? AW SHIT. Buy tickets for 4:35, this proves sucessful. UNDERESTIMATE SO EPICALLY FAILLY the crowd going to see this movie and all 7 of us have to sit very up close in front. It would've been fine if my hair wasn't tied back and hurting from applying seat-to-head pressure & the kid behind kept playing with the back of my chair Causing me to turn and -if you do that again i'll kill you- glare at him. He stopped and the movie was great. DON"T OVER EXPECT AMAZING WHEN YOU GO. It was good, just not AMAZING.
OLIVE GARDEN afterwards. YAY. I love it SO MUCH. It's amazing. Tiramisu! I was halfing with Joy but quickly, (btw we're cosplaying Italy & germany so if you don't get this WATCH HETALIA, NOW! IT"S ONLY 5 MINUTES PER EPISODE!) realized how quick Germany is and began to fight back the only way I knew how, eating quickly too. In the end, I noticed she was getting a bit more than half of Tiramus and thinking THIS IS ITALYS FAVORITE FOOD, I quickly ate three big bites causing us to split the last bite with me getting the biggest piece. :D ITALY CAN WIN BATTLES WHEN IT COMES TO ITALIAN FOOD, YOU KNOW? (you know comes from the yo in japanese at the end of sentances meaning, I tell you or you know [as i now told you, understand?] and the fact my teachers so freaking funny & cute when she does it that I've started to use it in english.)
Got home to do laundry, shower, and then quickly lazy on the bed for an hour to tell everyone of my day & next post will explain what I couldn't sum up in this. OTL. I just love to talk/write. THIS GOT SO LONG. /shot
Also, Ericka had a 'party' which consisted of chat rouletting with her friend and another for two hours and then doing actual party things once I decided to crawl into bed (after episode 3) at eleven. Party in your room next to mine with door open? Not so considerate, but she had let me know a week before if it would be okay and she told me about it the day before and that day too, so.... It just sucked cuz my ipod froze & then once I'd fixed it, it was like 'falling asleep' turn off ipod and become wide awake. I can't sleep with music, but party noises didn't help either... Finally went to bed after I texted and they moved to the living room at around 1:30.
Saturday, woke up at 8:10 to get ready and arrive on campus at 9:12 for Japanese Expo. Joy found Neal so we chatted in line for like 5 minutes before going inside and rushing to what I mis-read as Korean languages at 9:30 and really it was " You guys here for Yidish?" when we walked in & then like bow and walk out. Korean was at 10:00, which was great. ANN YONG! & some more words I learned but forgot & have the paper to learn later from. Had Japanese food, Russian pancake thing, french pastry, and got my name written in arabic, japanese(Laura wrote it in pretty calligraphy since we both know I can write it myself only crappy), and Chinese. Got to see how to do a yukata as well from my Sensee Machiko Bomberger-sama. Her mom is so cute & OLD, but cute. Also heard japanese folk tales, learned about chinese outfits, played latin guessing game, and had fun. It was overall, culturally rewarding. Will hope to bring Alex next time, he'd have fun.
Taco bell with Anee-chan. CHEAP and filling. :'D And then anime club, fun (weird chinese anime though) RUSHED to Ericka's play at 7 (got there at 7 having left at 6:45, from anime club and jogging to car), which turned out to be SO FUNNY. I can't wait till they open this Thursday. <3 Got home, played Blackjack with Anee-chan(Joy) bed at 1.
Sunday, Rush to check tickets for Alice in wonderland to find out it's what? SOLD OUT. Frick. Drive to her house to print ones at 4 and they get sold out within 10 minutes again? AW SHIT. Buy tickets for 4:35, this proves sucessful. UNDERESTIMATE SO EPICALLY FAILLY the crowd going to see this movie and all 7 of us have to sit very up close in front. It would've been fine if my hair wasn't tied back and hurting from applying seat-to-head pressure & the kid behind kept playing with the back of my chair Causing me to turn and -if you do that again i'll kill you- glare at him. He stopped and the movie was great. DON"T OVER EXPECT AMAZING WHEN YOU GO. It was good, just not AMAZING.
OLIVE GARDEN afterwards. YAY. I love it SO MUCH. It's amazing. Tiramisu! I was halfing with Joy but quickly, (btw we're cosplaying Italy & germany so if you don't get this WATCH HETALIA, NOW! IT"S ONLY 5 MINUTES PER EPISODE!) realized how quick Germany is and began to fight back the only way I knew how, eating quickly too. In the end, I noticed she was getting a bit more than half of Tiramus and thinking THIS IS ITALYS FAVORITE FOOD, I quickly ate three big bites causing us to split the last bite with me getting the biggest piece. :D ITALY CAN WIN BATTLES WHEN IT COMES TO ITALIAN FOOD, YOU KNOW? (you know comes from the yo in japanese at the end of sentances meaning, I tell you or you know [as i now told you, understand?] and the fact my teachers so freaking funny & cute when she does it that I've started to use it in english.)
Got home to do laundry, shower, and then quickly lazy on the bed for an hour to tell everyone of my day & next post will explain what I couldn't sum up in this. OTL. I just love to talk/write. THIS GOT SO LONG. /shot
Thursday, March 4, 2010
Sometimes, I still need you.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0HThCnCjikQ
http://andreapun.deviantart.com/art/at-that-moment-154950916
Been looking at photographs. Been going through like 20+ a day, trying to get through all the new ones the people I'm watching on DA continue uploading. It's insane. Yesterday I got it down to 250 and now it's 352. OTL.
So I started a folder on my computer for those photos that really inspire me and capture my interest. This way I don't have to save them & once the number finally goes to 0, I can relax knowing it's at 0, and then when more get added in I can shift through them, the ones I adore staying on top and the rest slipping through like sand.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DvwWS1CntN0
http://onlyinmydreamss.deviantart.com/art/by-the-beachside-155454350
Besides that, I'm finally getting unlazy again. I CAN DO IT! My grades last semester, 2 D's, brought down my GPA so bad I couldn't apply for some scholarships this year that I was waiting for since Freshman year (had to be a sophomore) so I'm pretty upset. But music and photos and talking to people really help. I can't do that again this semester, so it's time to restart.
I'll start paying attention in class and computer will be last. I was like that Freshman year and my gpa was 3.4, that's really good. Above the 3.2 I needed and now it's in the 2.9's and I'm like HOMFG, PANIC. Ha ha. I haven't had a 2. anything since Math that seventh grade year. OTL. I'm really dissapointed in myself, to have let me fallen this low, and to have gotten comfy in that hole. I need to crawl out, cover it up, and never look back. I need to keep moving forward. That'st he only way I feel I'll really enjoy living in the world... If I'm a part of it.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ThmUt7fXX6U
I'd been meaning to learn dances too anyways and to learn some songs, just for fun, you know? & take more pictures. So now I can really challenge myself with that. I need to keep working out too. I lost weight and then I took a break for 2 weeks eating fat stuff and gained it back. OH POOOO~ So it's time to take charge. Ha ha.
FIGHTING! [korean thing] GANBARE DESU YO! [Japanese thing] Do your best![my mom.]
& so I leave you with this: http://super-anne.deviantart.com/art/Optimistic-139517753
http://andreapun.deviantart.com/art/at-that-moment-154950916
Been looking at photographs. Been going through like 20+ a day, trying to get through all the new ones the people I'm watching on DA continue uploading. It's insane. Yesterday I got it down to 250 and now it's 352. OTL.
So I started a folder on my computer for those photos that really inspire me and capture my interest. This way I don't have to save them & once the number finally goes to 0, I can relax knowing it's at 0, and then when more get added in I can shift through them, the ones I adore staying on top and the rest slipping through like sand.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DvwWS1CntN0
http://onlyinmydreamss.deviantart.com/art/by-the-beachside-155454350
Besides that, I'm finally getting unlazy again. I CAN DO IT! My grades last semester, 2 D's, brought down my GPA so bad I couldn't apply for some scholarships this year that I was waiting for since Freshman year (had to be a sophomore) so I'm pretty upset. But music and photos and talking to people really help. I can't do that again this semester, so it's time to restart.
I'll start paying attention in class and computer will be last. I was like that Freshman year and my gpa was 3.4, that's really good. Above the 3.2 I needed and now it's in the 2.9's and I'm like HOMFG, PANIC. Ha ha. I haven't had a 2. anything since Math that seventh grade year. OTL. I'm really dissapointed in myself, to have let me fallen this low, and to have gotten comfy in that hole. I need to crawl out, cover it up, and never look back. I need to keep moving forward. That'st he only way I feel I'll really enjoy living in the world... If I'm a part of it.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ThmUt7fXX6U
I'd been meaning to learn dances too anyways and to learn some songs, just for fun, you know? & take more pictures. So now I can really challenge myself with that. I need to keep working out too. I lost weight and then I took a break for 2 weeks eating fat stuff and gained it back. OH POOOO~ So it's time to take charge. Ha ha.
FIGHTING! [korean thing] GANBARE DESU YO! [Japanese thing] Do your best![my mom.]
& so I leave you with this: http://super-anne.deviantart.com/art/Optimistic-139517753
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